[Badmotherz]

Hey gang,

Been a while as I've been hellishly busy with holiday, work and family, but back in the saddle now.

Anyway need some advice with some copy. Am looking to launch a new website health check service but I think the copy I've written lacks punch. Anyone have any thoughts?

Thanks

R

[Quimp]

When my focus moved to the "Buy now!" section, I instantly thought the price was £200. The emphasis could be added on the £150 (as far as word placement goes, I see you already use bold tags). An idea would be to illustrate the difference in price by saying that there is a £50 saving, or even a 25% saving.

Also, "website health check service" isn't an expression often used and the words feel like separate entities. Making it italicized or capitalized would probably help.

"The services includes" should be "The services include". I'm not exactly sure, as English isn't my native language. I'm afraid this his could be a tricky one like "the series is interesting". I'm pretty sure though that compatability isn't compatible with the dictionary's word listing!


Edit: oh and by the way, very nice website!

Hope this helps,
Quimp

[notbanksy]

I agree it lacks a little punch, but it could be a lot worse. Don't be so hard on yourself. I saw some room for improvement, so decided to have a shot at it.

Quote

Website health check

Building and publishing a website is not enough. Companies looking to stand out on the web need to ensure that they have a quality, polished website that's regularly updated.

Is your website up to it?

How do you know if your website is match fit? Putting look and feel aside, a website needs to communicate strong messages about who you are, what you do and what your company stands for. This must be done clearly, and in a way your customers can readily access without barriers.

How to check?

My website health check takes a holistic view of your site. A detailed report will be produced outlining a series of recommendations you should adopt that will give your website a shot in the arm. I will improve:
* Code quality
* Content readability and quality
* SEO rankings and grade
* Browser compatability
* Accessibility and usability

[wizely]

notbanksy, on Jun 3 2008, 09:44, said:

I saw some room for improvement, so decided to have a shot at it.

Brilliant!

[Badmotherz]

Thanks chaps. As I thought just needed a little bit of polish. Really appreciate the support.

R